Everyone Should Have At Least One Retarded Friend

GIRL AT BUS STOP

Are you an art teacher?

ME

No. What made you think I'm an art teacher? Is it because I'm wearing a long raincoat that looks kind of like a smock?

GIRL AT BUS STOP

And because of your hair and the color.

MAN
(As we board the bus)

She asked me if I was a lawyer.

ME

Did you ask her why?

MAN

(Shrugs and smiles.)

Once I was on the bus, I looked down to reach into my pocket and, for the first time since I'd left the apartment, I had a good view of my raincoat. There was a HUGE stain on it -all the way down the front. The kind of stain that might look like a shadow if the coat were hanging so that creases formed, but when the coat was being worn and was nice and FLAT, in direct outdoor lighting, it looked nothing like a shadow. It looked like a HUGE STAIN! I opened my coat for the duration of the trip so it could crease a bit and restore the "Stain? What stain? That's a shadow!" look.

This is what I like about developmentally disabled adults. Especially the young adults. They won't stare at you and pretend there's nothing wrong with your clothes. With absolutely no malice (and that's the best part, there's no malice), they will look you straight in the eye and say "Are you an art teacher?" -Which in this case was another way of saying "Have you looked at yourself in the mirror lately? Does your mamma know you left the house like that?"

-Everyone should have at least one person like this in their lives.